The Truth About Paradise

Culture shock is a term used to describe the sensation of spending time in a new
country. [1] Ideally, you undergo the Honeymoon stage, overcome the Frustration stage,
eventually Adjust and then Accept your predicament. However, this process may never finish,
which is why our parents may seem in perpetual frustration with our behavior, blaming the West
and conflicting cultural values that contrast with those back home, wherever that may be.

Of course, our parents must have once liked this place enough to want to stay. Enter the
first phase of culture shock: The Honeymoon Phase. The last time you went on vacation, you
snapped photos, perhaps even bought a souvenir. Everything was new and exciting. Some
places retain the Honeymoon Phase, such as resorts, because you never spend enough time
there to reach the frustration stage. When relatives from ‘back home’ visit us in the West, they
experience a ‘Honeymoon Phase’ of sorts. Part of the honeymoon stage, as described by
Murdoch university, is being ‘captivated’ with your surroundings. [2]

They want to live like us, while we romanticize living like them. We carry ‘back home’
with nostalgia. Wherever you reside, culture is viewed as indulgent. It’s the foundation of family
weddings, the language you use with those familiar and close to you. Sometimes, it may feel
like our culture or religion sets us back. Still, at the end of the day, we’d be lying if we said we
didn’t find comfort in traditional food, clothing, and languages that connect us to our ancestors
and family.

However, the Honeymoon Stage always comes to an end. Eventually, the frustration of
being in a new place kicks in. Even though we seemingly have everything here, there are some
things that can’t be replicated. Family members left behind, the taste of certain foods we will just
never get right here, the landscapes, the sounds of your language being spoken in every corner.
Some frustration may stem from religious differences, as religion isn’t as ingrained into Western
practices as it may be back home. You might just feel lonely, lost in a new land. In 2018,
Statistics Canada stated that immigrants generally reported higher levels of loneliness than the
Canadian born across various socioeconomic and demographic groups. [3]

Eventually, we adjust. We find ways to adjust because adjustability is just about as
ingrained into human nature as the instinct to breathe. But how much can we adjust without
losing our entire culture? A piece of you will always reside in the place your heart calls home.
Some adjust so well it’s as if they were here all along.

A lot may never accept that they live in a completely different country. At heart, you will
always be Pakistani, or Egyptian, or Palestinian, or Indian, or wherever your ‘home’ may be. In
an increasingly multicultural Canadian society, where many youths are reclaiming their origins
and celebrating their heritage instead of trying to conform, perhaps our cultures can really thrive
across oceans.

[1] “Culture Shock Part 1: The Four Stages.” Murdoch University – The Place for Free Thinking,
Murdoch University, 16 Apr. 2019, www.murdoch.edu.au/news/articles/part-1-culture-shock-the-
four-stages.
[2] Learning, Participate. “The 4 Stages of Culture Shock.” Medium, Global Perspectives, 11 Mar.
2019, medium.com/global-perspectives/the-4-stages-of-culture-shock-a79957726164.
[3] Hou, Feng, et al. “Self-Reported Loneliness among Recent Immigrants, Long-Term
Immigrants, and Canadian-Born Individuals.” Statistics Canada, Government of Canada,
Statistics Canada, 28 July 2021, www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/pub/36-28-
0001/2021007/article/00001-eng.htm.