The Greatest Benefit of Being Humiliated

According to Psychology Today, embarrassment is something we bring upon ourselves, while “humiliation is something that is brought upon us by others.” This can be done in many ways. Being ignored, overlooked, taken for granted, denied our rights, rejected, abused, betrayed, and abandoned, all of these can lead to humiliation 一 and unfortunately, as adolescents and young adults, these are things we experience almost everyday. 

For youngsters, social humiliation can be a great source of anguish. From family and school drama, to workplace politics, we are surrounded by humiliating situations just waiting to happen. As painful and as detestable as humiliation might be, at the end of the day, it is a part of our lives, and will definitely come up in one way or another. The only precaution we can take is to know how to deal with it when we experience it, and the only way we will learn how to deal with it is by observing the lives of those who were humiliated the most; the prophets.1 

Nuh, Ibrahim, Musa, ‘Isa, and the Prophet Muhammad are known as Al-’Ulul Azm, the Possessors of Greatness, or the five greatest prophets, and yet, when we look at their lives, we can easily find instances where their people humiliated them. Here, we learn our first lesson about humiliation: Your status amongst people does not determine your worth. 

What made these prophets so special? It was their perseverance and calling to Allah’s way. It was their striving and patience when things became difficult. It was their submission and humility towards the commands of Allah that elevated them. Here, we learn our second lesson about humiliation: Your own actions and accomplishments determine your worth.

Nuh was called crazy by his people for building a ship in a place where there was no water nearby. Ibrahim was told to stop preaching or else his own father would stone him to death. Musa was repeatedly disobeyed by his people after he had saved them from a tyrannical leader and guided them to the truth. ‘Isa’s words were twisted by his people and they took him as God instead of the One he was calling the people to worship.2 And finally, the Prophet Muhammad, he was ridiculed by his people again and again. He was accused of being a liar, a sorcerer, and a madman. He was plotted against, his family was hurt, and they were slandered and shamed by people who did not even know them.3 

The thing is, humiliation helps us realize how truly alone we are in this world. It rids us of the shackles of serving society and striving to meet the status quo. It helps us realize that we cannot handle our problems on our own and we are not self-sufficient. So what do we do now with this realization? Let go? Stop trying? Give up? 

No, absolutely not! We turn towards the One who is Self-Sufficient, All Powerful, All Seeing, All Hearing, and All Knowing. We open our hearts in front of the One who understands our pain and suffering when no one else even acknowledges its existence. We learn to rely on Our Creator for our happiness and success, and not His creation 一 just as the prophets did. 

When we realize that our success or failure only depends on whether Allah is happy with us or not, we need not go elsewhere asking others for forgiveness or seeking their approval. We simply raise our hands to the One who created us and ask Him to forgive us, and to give us the strength to forgive ourselves. 

That is the benefit of being humiliated, and what a great benefit it is. Alhamdulillah. 

1Once a man asked the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), “O Messenger of Allah! Which of the people is tried most severely?” He replied, “The Prophets, then those nearest to them, then those nearest to them.” [Tirmidhi 2398]

2For more information on the stories of these prophets, please refer to Mufti Ismail Menk’s lecture series on Youtube, “Stories of the Prophets” 

3For more information on the life of the Prophet Muhammad, please refer to Shaykh Yasir Qadhi’s lecture series on Youtube, “Seerah of the Prophet Muhammad (S)”